Hey, Jessie The First Kiss
by Nysha63
Summary: Young Ryan gets his first kiss.
1. Default Chapter

Hey, Jessie

The First Kiss

Ryan carefully weaved around the drunken teenagers, hoping to snag a piece of pizza before it was all gone. Trey had made it clear that he was to stay of out sight, but he was starving. Lunch was long gone and his mother's nightly brawl with the boyfriend of the week started earlier than usual. Ryan had opted to tagalong with Trey, rather than brave the kitchen and hope they were too busy fighting with each other to notice him.

With a sigh of relief, Ryan reached the picnic table and snapped up the last piece from the cardboard box. As he went to take a bite Trey's girlfriend Robin grabbed his arm and slurred that he hadn't paid for it yet.

Ryan looked at her in confusion. She laughed and told him it would cost him a kiss. Before he could respond, she had her hand on the back of his head, her mouth on his, and was forcing her tongue past his teeth. The stale taste of cigarettes and beer, mixed with pepperoni pizza nearly made him gag.

"Shit, quit hitting on my girlfriend," yelled Trey. 

Ryan was jerked back and shoved to the ground. Trey stood over him, his fists tightly curled.

One of the other kids yelled across the yard, "Hey, Robin, Trey must not be much of a man if you're hitting on his little brother." 

This brought a burst of laughter from the group of teens.

Ryan watched Trey's eyes narrow and scrambled to his feet, backing away from the angry young man. He bumped into somebody and flinched, expecting to be knocked down again. Instead he looked up and saw Jessie, Robin's 14 year old sister, looking back at him, her eyes troubled behind the wire rimmed frames of her glasses. She stepped in front of him and frowned at Trey and Robin.

"C'mon, there's more pizza in the house." she said, taking him by the shoulder and leading him into the kitchen. After handing him a paper plate loaded with pizza she reached into the fridge.

"Coke or Sprite?" she asked, holding up a bottle of each.

"Coke" he replied, accepting the cold pop with a smile of thanks.

"I'm watching a Simpson's marathon," she said. "You can to join me if you want."

Ryan was surprised at the offer. Trey had been dating Robin for several months and Ryan generally hung around when they were at her house. Jessie hadn't said more than a handful of words to him and it was obvious that she disliked Trey and the rest of the delinquents her sister brought home in the evenings after their mom left for work. Usually she locked herself in her room as soon as they came through the door.

"Uh, yeah, thanks," Ryan stammered as he walked over to the couch in front of the television.

While Jessie chuckled at the antics of Homer and Bart, Ryan shot sideways glances at her. He couldn't help but wonder why Trey called her an ugly duckling. Her blue eyes sparkled and danced in the reflection of the TV and the light from the table lamp next to the couch brought out streaks of blonde in her light brown hair. The only thing about her he would call ugly was the shapeless, gray sweatshirt she wore with her jeans. She definitely did not have her sister's sense of style. Ryan had never seen Jessie wear anything but her private school uniform or baggy shirts and jeans.

"Why don't you ever wear nice clothes like Robin?" he blurted out suddenly.

Jessie looked at him in surprise and he immediately tried to backtrack.

"I mean, you're really pretty, but, um. Aw, shit, I'm sorry." Ryan stared at his hands as his face grew red.

"It's safer. This keeps your brother and his creepy friends from confusing me with her." Jessie's voice was hard and bitter. She brought her knees up to her chest, hugging them as she stared intently at the Domino's commercial on the TV.

Ryan, remembering Robin's unwanted attention, as well as a few others, immediately understood what she meant. He scooted closer to Jessie and tentatively put his hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry," he said softly.

Jessie sighed and turned toward him, reaching out to gently stroke his cheek. "I know, it's not you," she replied.

The two kids stared at each other for a long moment. Then Jessie gave a small laugh and turned back to the TV.

"So, do you have a boyfriend?" Ryan asked her.

"No, remember, I go to an all girls school." she answered.

"What about the boys around here?" he asked.

"I'm not interested in druggies or drop-outs. I want a guy who is willing to work and get out of this hell hole. I don't see anyone here who fits that description." Jessie explained.

"I'm not sticking around here. I'm going to get a good job and be somebody, " Ryan said.

Jessie laughed and gave him a motherly pat on the head. "Good for you," she replied.

Ryan glared at her. "I'm only 2 years younger than you. You don't need to treat me like a little kid."

Jessie just smiled at him. "Okay."

Ryan dropped his eyes and licked his lips. Then he looked back at her and asked, "Hey, Jessie, can I kiss you?"

Jessie laughed, thinking he was joking. When she realized Ryan was serious, she looked at him uncertainly, suddenly shy. Then she smiled and nodded her head.

Ryan leaned in and touched his lips to hers. Jessie's tongue lightly licked his bottom lip and swept across his teeth. She tasted like Sprite and cherry lip gloss which instantly became his two favorite things. He was surprised at the swift surge of electricity that swept through his body and settled in his groin.

Too soon the kiss was over. Jessie straightened up and pushed the stunned boy back into a sitting position. "We're watching the Simpsons," she said firmly, although she did put her arm around Ryan's shoulders and allowed him to snuggle close.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Hey, Ryan. C'mon, little bro, wake up. We gotta jet before Robin's mom gets home," Trey shook Ryan's shoulder roughly and pulled him to his feet. Ryan looked around the living room in a sleepy daze, wondering if it had all been a dream.


	2. The Second Kiss

****

Hey, Jessie

The Second Kiss

Ryan slammed his back against the tree, feeling the rough bark dig into his skin through the thin material of his t-shirt. He dropped to his knees, cradling his injured wrist, and trying desperately to steady his ragged breathing.

"Shit, it's not my fault the bastard got fired again," he muttered to himself as he blurrily inspected the fresh cigarette burn on his wrist. He poked at his swelling right eye and was dismayed at the bright red blood covering his fingertips.

"What the hell am I gonna tell my teacher tomorrow?" he asked himself. "I can't keep falling down the same fucking stairs."

"Hey Ryan." Jessie's soft voice startled him out of his self-contemplation. Dressed in a plaid, pleated skirt and soft, white blouse, her long hair braided and tied back with ribbon, Jessie looked innocent and surreally out of place among the littered yards and rundown homes. Ryan moved to cover his wrist, but Jessie was faster. Holding his hand she inspected the blistering welt.

"Mike?" she asked, correctly identifying Dawn's current boyfriend.

"Yeah," Ryan mumbled, embarrassed to have his abuse exposed.

"Well, let's get it cleaned up," Jessie tugged on Ryan's hand until he stood up. She guided him down the block to her own, immaculately kept home.

"Jess," Mrs. Taylor stopped, frowning when she saw who her daughter was leading into the house. Her opinion of Trey was even lower than Jessie's and she disapproved of Ryan on general association.

"He got beat up, Mom," Jessie explained.

Mrs. Taylor came closer, her eyes softening as she examined the still bleeding gash above Ryan's eye, as well as the yellowing bruises on his chin and jaw.

"Not the first time this month either, poor little guy," she said, smoothing his hair back from his face. Ryan wasn't sure whether he should be relieved that she wasn't upset with him or humiliated that his small stature made him appear closer to ten than twelve.

"Patch him up, Jessie. There's Top Ramen for dinner and you two can have the ice cream bars in the freezer for dessert." With a final pat to Ryan's head and a kiss on Jessie's cheek, Mrs. Taylor left for work, locking the front door as she went.

"Go wash your hands and then sit here," Jessie ordered, pointing to a metal chair beside the kitchen table. 

Ryan was impressed with the array of first aid supplies Jessie spread on the battered tabletop. He felt lucky if he could find a simple band aid at his house. Jessie had bandages of different sizes and shapes, gauze, tape, antiseptic wipes, Neosporin, Bactine, and Tylenol. She popped the lid on that and tipped two white caplets into her hand.

"Here, take these." She handed the pills to Ryan along with a can of Coke.

Ryan obediently swallowed the Tylenol and then drained the can. He sat quietly in his seat as Jessie cleaned and bandaged his wounds.

"That should do it," she said, ruffling his hair. "Are you hurt anywhere else?"

Ryan pulled back and glared at her. "You don't have to treat me like I'm a little kid."

"You are a little kid," Jessie replied with a maternal smile that just antagonized Ryan more.

"You didn't think that the other night." Ryan stood up, wishing like hell he was tall enough to look her in the eye. God, no wonder she thought he was just some stupid baby.

"Ry," Jessie started to respond but Ryan reached up and caressed her lips with his fingers, effectively shushing her.

"Hey, Jessie, can I kiss you?" Ryan tilted his head and asked with just a hint of a smile.

Jessie returned the smile, shaking her head slightly, but she bent down and touched her lips to Ryan's. Ryan moved his hand to the side of her face and pressed his body against hers as she slipped her tongue into his open mouth.

The harsh clank of a door being unlocked caused them to jump apart, breathless and a bit stunned. However, by the time Robin and Trey stumbled into the room they were breathing normally and innocently repacking the first aid kit.


	3. More Than a Kiss

****

Hey, Jessie

More Than a Kiss

Ryan thumped the potato masher into the bowl, turning the tomato into an unappetizing mass of pulp and juice.

"I don't know why we're doing it this way," he complained. "Tomato, orange, grape, cranberry; they all come in juice boxes. We could have used that instead of mushing up the real thing."

"They add Vitamin C to juice, so the experiment wouldn't have worked," Jessie answered. "Now, for your hypothesis, which ones do you think naturally contain Vitamin C?"

"Um, I know oranges do and I think tomatoes, I'm not sure about the others." He rinsed off the masher and looked at the bowl of grapes, not sure how to proceed.

"Try cutting them in half first," Jessie suggested. "I think that'll make them easier to mash."

"God, Ry, why're you letting her turn you into a geek?" Trey wandered into the kitchen, sneering at the on-going science experiment. "Next you'll being wearing dorky glasses and a pocket protector."

"It's just a Science Fair, Trey. I'm not applying for college." Ryan's voice was tentative as he tried to appease his irritated brother.

"Damn straight, you're an Atwood. We don't do college, so don't start thinking you're something special just because Geek Girl here likes playing school." Trey smacked the back of Ryan's head for emphasis.

"What's wrong with wanting to be something besides a pathetic loser like the rest of his family?" Jessie retorted, stepping between Trey and Ryan.

"Watch who you're calling a loser," Trey said. He stood over the younger girl, his eyes burning into hers, his fists clenching and unclenching.

Ryan made soothing noises and tried to pull Jessie back, but she stood her ground, glaring at Trey, refusing to be intimidated. 

"Aw, Trey, what're you wasting time with them for?" Robin put her arm around Trey and slipped her fingers into the waistband of his jeans, pulling him towards her. "Let the babies play school if that's what turns them on. We have better games to play."

Trey looked down at her, his face still hard. She fiddled with his zipper, pulling him from the kitchen and into her bedroom, slamming the door behind them.

"Let the babies play school," Jessie mocked in a singsong voice. She stared at the closed door and frowned for a moment, then turned to Ryan and said in her normal voice, "Let's go to my room while they're busy." 

Ryan's eyes lit up and he happily followed Jessie into her bedroom, sitting on her bed while she locked her door. He and Jessie had gotten into a pleasant routine of kissing in her room while Robin and Trey played their own games in Robin's room. Ryan thought he was getting pretty good at kissing, plus he was slowly inching his way up the outside of Jessie's shirt. He was pretty sure he was almost to the point where he would actually get to feel her breast. Thinking about that possibility made his dick jump with anticipation. 

Jessie twirled around, her skirt spreading out around her waist, almost but not quite rising high enough to allow Ryan a glimpse at the panties hidden beneath. With a glint in her eyes that Ryan didn't recognize, she began unbuttoning her blouse.

"I don't want it to get wrinkled," she explained as she hung it on the door handle.

"Uh, yeah, ok," Ryan had trouble getting words out. He gazed at the lacy fabric covering her breasts, reaching out to caress the prize he had worked so long to obtain.

"Not so fast," Jessie smiled and grabbed his wrists, setting his hands on her naked waist. She pushed him back on the bed and knelt over him, smiling wickedly. 

"You've got to ask first," she said, sliding his hands closer to their goal.

Ryan pulled his eyes from her chest to her eyes and then back down. "Yeah, right. Um, hey, Jessie, can I, um," Although the exact words didn't come, she slowly guided his hands up, hissing slightly as his fingers squeezed and fondled her small breasts.

Jessie bent down and began attacking his lips and rhythmically thrusting her tongue into his mouth. She moved slowly to one side and onto her back, encouraging him with her mouth and hands to follow her movements until he lay prone upon her body panting and somewhat unsure. 

Her eyes danced with amusement and she slowly slid her hands up Ryan's waist, pushing his t-shirt to his chest. He held his weight on his arms and with a few awkward gymnastics Jessie was able to pull the shirt over his head.

As she pulled him in for another kiss, Ryan realized that Jessie had also unclasped the front of her bra. The warmth of skin-on-skin contact, coupled with a sudden recognition that he was nestled between her thighs with only a few layers of cloth separating the two of them, triggered a fiery rush of emotions. When she began thrusting against him, he abandoned her lips and buried his head into the curve of neck, pushing back to the rhythm she set.

It was over too soon. He barely had time to register her soft cry before he stiffened and uttered his own, amazed and delighted at the wonder of it all. 

Ryan slid off to the side and cradled Jessie, smoothing her hair and gently stroking her face. He smiled at her and whispered, "Hey, Jessie, can I kiss you?" 


	4. Not Only a Kiss

****

Hey, Jessie

Not Only a Kiss

Ryan surveyed the crowded gym, amazed at the transformation. Lunch tables that were normally covered in discarded food now held cardboard displays announcing each student's scientific knowledge and competence. He couldn't believe his Vitamin C experiment garnered the first place ribbon for his grade, but there it was, tacked to the top of his board. Mrs. Taylor had swooped by early on and given him a proud hug, congratulating Dawn for raising such an intelligent son.

Dawn was another source of amazement for Ryan. She was here sober and nicely dressed, just like all the other mothers, beaming her pride for her youngest son to everyone who walked by his display. He was delighted that she had not only taken time off to attend his event, but that she was also enjoying his success. 

When the Science Fair ended the two of them headed over to McDonalds and celebrated with Big Macs and McFlurries. Surprisingly relaxed they laughed and talked, Dawn effervesce in her approval and Ryan relishing the positive attention. Later, as they drove home, Dawn continued to praise Ryan. According to her, he could be anything he wanted, he would get scholarships to the finest schools and make them all proud. Ryan felt ten feet tall and happily believed every word. 

That happiness burst into deluded fragments once inside the door of their squalid duplex. Mike was waiting for them and quickly traversed the tiny living room to backhand Ryan to the floor.

"Stop it," yelled Dawn. "What the hell did you do that for?"

"Your boy genius didn't put the lid back on the garbage can and the dog spread trash all over the backyard." Mike jerked Ryan to his feet and shoved him toward the back door. "Get out there and clean that shit up," he ordered.

Ryan stumbled out the door, sucking his bleeding lip. He cursed silently to himself as he stomped around the weed-filled yard, picking up the scattered trash and depositing it into the battered cans next to the fence. When he finished he set a broken cinder block on the lid to discourage the dog and slunk into the darkened house. Mike and his mother had vanished to the bedroom, but Ryan could hear their arguing as plainly as if they were in the front room.

He grabbed a change of clothes and headed to the bathroom where he quickly showered, washing off the stench of trash and disillusionment. Once he was clean and dressed he retreated to his bedroom. Frustrated by the crushing blow of his normal existence he stood staring at the closed bedroom door; wanting, needing, what? To escape? Peace? His mother? Tears stung his eyes as he shamefully wished for the woman he knew only existed in his fantasies. He sucked in his breath and gripped his arms across his chest until bruises formed and the desire faded, replaced by the dull awareness that this was all his life had to offer.

Ryan abruptly left his bedroom, pausing just inside the front door to make sure that Dawn and Mike were too immersed in their own squabbles to worry about him. He left quietly and walked quickly down the dark street until he was standing in front of the Taylor house. Mrs. Taylor had already left for work, but Trey and his friends could be seen laughing and drinking through the open curtains.

Ryan had no desire to be humiliated and abused by his brother, so he climbed over the chain-linked fence and walked through the freshly mowed lawn to stand outside Jessie's bedroom window. He knocked softly and was rewarded moments later when the curtains parted as Jessie peered into the darkness. She instantly opened the window when she saw who had knocked. 

"Hey, Jessie." Ryan's voice cracked and he caught his breathe, unable to go on. 

Jessie removed the screen and helped him clamber through the opening. After she replaced the screen and locked the window she turned to Ryan, sighing at the split lip and distressed at the conflicting emotions that flit across his face. She wanted desperately to comfort him, but was unsure how, knowing instinctively that he needed more than she could ever give. In the end, she turned off the light and slipped out of her tank top and panties. Ryan sucked in his lip and watched wide eyed as she slid beneath the covers of her bed. She held them open and gestured for him to join her. 

Ryan slowly removed his own clothing, embarrassed by the ill-fitting briefs his mother picked up at the dollar store. His dingy, second hand clothes were a hateful contrast to the clean and colorful bedding surrounding Jessie. Once naked, he crawled in beside her and pulled the covers around them. Snuggled together, she cupped his face and gently kissed his injured lip. Ryan began to reciprocate, tentatively at first but quickly becoming more insistent until he balanced above her, waiting for her acquiescence. 

Her gasp of pain as he thrust into her startled him and he tried to pull away, but Jessie nibbled his earlobe and drew him back. "It's ok, baby. Don't stop."

He nuzzled the soft flesh beneath her jaw and rocked forward, encouraged as she rose to meet him. Ryan allowed the rhythmic motion and rising euphoria to pour over his misery, covering the jagged points and chasing away the dark shadows with a sudden burst of light.

Afterward, Jessie held him close, cradling him in her arms as he fell into contented sleep, entrusting himself to the safety of her soft caresses and soothing murmurs.


	5. The Last Kiss

****

Hey, Jessie

The Last Kiss

Ryan grunted as Arturo practically pitched the heavy packing box at him. Trey and his friends had jumped when Mr. Anson, Jessie's new step-father, offered to pay them $20 each and a 6 pack of Bud to help pack and load the U-haul truck. In reality, Eddie and Arturo were doing most of the work while Trey tried to console a nearly hysterical Robin. 

After handing the box to Mrs. Taylor, no, Ryan corrected himself, Mrs. Anson, Ryan walked slowly back to the empty house. He wandered around Jessie's room, dragging his finger along the wall as he walked the perimeter, trying not to think about Jessie leaving. The loud honking of the U-haul jolted him out of his reverie. He headed outside and stood on the curb as Trey and Mr. Anson got Robin into the truck. Mr. Anson then paid off the teens, gave his wife a quick kiss, and drove off. 

Mrs. Anson pulled Ryan into a big hug. "Don't be so sad," she said. "Arizona isn't that far away. Maybe you could come visit once we get settled."

"Right," thought Ryan. "It might as well be fucking Australia for all the chance I have of ever going there." But he just smiled politely and returned the hug. 

Turning to Jessie, he tried to smile. "Hey, Jessie," he started, but was unable to speak past the lump in his throat. 

Jessie surprised everyone by giving him a hug and a hard kiss. "I love you, Ryan Atwood," she whispered. 

"Keep him safe. Please." she pleaded, looking over at Trey. She hugged Ryan again and then ran to the car without looking back.

Ryan watched the old Pontiac as it headed down the street, blinking hard to rid his eyes of unwanted tears. He lowered his head and stared at his feet, expecting to be razzed by the teens leaning against Arturo's Mustang. Surprisingly though, Eddie simply handed him a beer with a look of respect and Trey draped his arm companionably across his shoulders. 

"C'mon, Stud," he said. "We'll get you laid. It'll make you feel better." 

***********************************************

Ryan watched Sandy's retreating back with the usual teenage mixture of amusement and irritation. "So that was the Sex Talk," he thought to himself. "I wonder what Sandy would say if he knew I've been using condoms since I starting having sex in the 6th grade." He laid back on his bed and contemplated the ceiling. "What the hell was he talking about anyway? Babbling about sex and love like they mean the same thing or even belong together in the same sentence. Sometimes he sounds just like Seth. Maybe instead of nodding my head I should have told him the truth, sex is something you do to feel good and love-love is a just lie people say to justify hurting you."

~finis~


End file.
